I will see it when I believe it.
It is true, death is the warrior’s best friend. Continue reading Death
“You shall now refer to me as _________” (fill in the blank).
The whole idea of undergoing a name change operation late in life seems ridiculous to me. I’d even call it a pet peeve. I can understand someone in their teens or younger, who really doesn’t identify with the name they were given, deciding to change it to something else. One of the guys I went to school with changed his name at least two times and back again and then to something new, I lost count. We haven’t been in contact for many years; he probably has changed his name again by now.
Once a person is past the teens and more settled into their life, a name change becomes silly and complicated. There are all the logistical headaches i.e. notifying acquaintances of the change, changing email addresses, updating bank accounts, passport, driver’s license and the rest of the legal rigamarole. My mom decided to change her name. That’s fine. It’s her decision, whether I think it is a good idea or not. Besides, I usually call her “mom” anyway.
In the grand scheme of things, in the vast universe, I could care less what sounds and letters other people use to refer to the minuscule lump of atoms / configuration of impermanent thoughts and energies that coalesce to form “me”. In essence I am much more than that and at the same time none of it.
The ever present now is constantly changing. The atoms in the body, the perspective of consciousness, the surroundings – are all changing faster than a millisecond and everything is completely new, even though it may seem to be the same and static. Technically, I am a new person every moment. Why not have a new name for each new moment?
So yeah, I started to think about it more. I started to look at it from a different perspective and shed off my pet peeve. Perhaps there is something to this name change business after all.
I started thinking about what I would want to be called if I were to do a name change. And, the first thing that popped into my head was… Continue reading Name Change
I truly believe that the source of all my problems is identifying with a sense of self. Whether I am identifying with my body or the thoughts that are flashing through my mind, believing that “this is me” and reacting in an ignorant way is the only thing that is problematic. Even when something happens outside of my body / mind that is “bad” (like if somebody stole my car) it is only the way my perceived sense of self is reacting to the occurrence that is uncomfortable. Perhaps the thief did me a favor and prevented me from getting in a car accident the next day.
This collection of thoughts and atoms that I think is me, is actually just a little piece of the entire reality.
And, it is not the self that is the problem. There are a lot of good things that come with being an individual. If I can experience the first person while maintaining a third person perspective, as if watching a movie, life is much more enjoyable. Sometimes it is a drama, sometimes a comedy, sometimes a romance, sometimes a thriller. It is all entertaining.
I believe that the only failure is not even trying.
If an attempt is made, regardless of the outcome, it is a successful learning experience. Those who succeed do not waste energy lamenting “failures”. They stay focused on what it is they want to achieve and make it happen with unbending intent.
The ultimate success is to live fully in the present moment, carrying out whatever activities bring inspiration without any attachment to the results.
Ultimately there is nowhere to go, no goal to be reached, no achievement to be attained (and there definitely isn’t a teleport). However, there are profound benefits to traveling the spiritual path. I must walk the path, and more importantly, want to walk the path. I know I will end up right back where I started, where I have always been, yet I keep walking. This a journey worth taking.
I have come to a very visceral discernment that reliance on anything temporary does not ultimately lead to fulfillment. This rules out everything tangible in the universe, because everything we can touch, taste, smell, hear, see or perceive in any way that relies on a physical vessel for consciousness is impermanent. This does not exclude other possibilities…
I embrace everything with complete openness — even the possibility that I may not embrace everything tomorrow morning.
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night with an acute awareness of how fragile life is and a palpable sense of what it would feel like to be taking my last breath. It is said that the only guarantee in life is death. When the time comes, everything that has culminated into my experience of the present moment, the storehouse of influences and thoughts that give shape to how I interpret the world will disintegrate completely. Continue reading Midnight Musings – Mortality Says Hello